31 San Francisco
THE INTERVIEW
July 9, 2009. 8:46pm
Dir. Travis Mathews: hello sir
Dean: good evening, kind sir
Travis: set the scene for us. where are you, what are you doing, listening to, etc...
Dean: ha ha, well, I'm drinking a Budweiser from the can, just ate half a pizza, and I'm watching "Gung Ho" on VHS-it's a classic 80's movie with Michael Keaton. my cat is going crazy and I'm happy to have the house to myself
Travis: im more of a mr mom fan
Dean: ha, haven't seen that in a while
Travis: Ive selected some smiths to play while doing this interview. are you comfortable with that?
Dean: yes indeed. that reminds me of my favorite smiths t-shirt i lost a coupla weeks ago in the downstairs of deco :(
Travis: that's terrible. well, morrissey is here now to walk you through things.
THE VIDEO SHOOT
Travis: let's talk about IN THEIR ROOM. you were the first person i shot for this series, do you feel like a number one?
Dean: it was interesting being able to shape the focus of the shoot...i like collaborating as much as i like being directed, so, yeah...
Travis: when i went over to your place I hadn't fully conceptualized the ITR piece. I was just working from instinct and you were so open that it made it all pretty easy.
Dean: i have a lot of friends who are artists, film makers, and so forth, and i have seen a lot of them work through the same processes so that made it easier for me to kind of be open. that and having been in front of the camera myself a fair amount. it was actually a little funny for me to be wearing as much clothes as i was, truth be told. it's a new look for me :)
Travis: that's funny.
Dean: i know, huh?
Dean: my mom says I used to run around the yard naked, pounding my chest and saying my name when i was a kid. so...
Travis: i can hear your mom yelling, "jesse dean, get in here!"
Dean: yup, my grandma too. Jesse Dean, stack the woodpile! Jesse Dean, mow the lawn!
Travis: that's too much. i love it.
MAKING PORN
Travis: you do porn and your also a dancer, i expect that being comfortable with yourself helps in these arenas.
Dean: yeah, it's interesting...it was, and still is, challenging sometimes to do porn. i'm very sex positive, but sometimes when you're on set you're so focused on performing and making that money that once in a while all that goes out the window and I get super ill at ease with myself
Travis: ill at ease?
Dean: in the sense that i really want to be able to perform, but if the director is a pushy asshole or if you think your scene partner isn't really into you, you just don't get hard and then you kind of beat yourself up because you didn't perform
Travis: that makes sense. how many takes would you say go into one scene?
Dean: you only really get one take. most directors give you a certain amount of time to get hard (if I'm topping) and if you can't in that window, they just say "well we don't want to waste film so how about we just call it a day". which def does not help with the erection
Travis: uh, yeah. and then you feel like youre letting everyone down?
Dean: yeah, because your scene partner isn't gonna get paid, either, so you feel like a dbag. i've had a director yelling "god, i can't believe you can't get hard for this guy, i'd fuck him in 2 seconds, what the hell is wrong with you?", and that was after filming a BDSM scene for 5 hours and i was exhausted
Travis: what a dick
Dean: some guys get hard at the drop of a hat, but it really takes me a bit to get going. kissing and sucking dick gets me hard the quickest, but sometimes they don't want to see kissing because it's too "intimate", and I usually end up being the top because I have a big, uncut dick, and because of that they won't let me suck a guy off cuz I'm supposed to be the "dominant" one. even though I enjoy bottoming a lot, because of how i look i get cast as the top most often. you know, my facial hair, tattoos, etc
Travis: if they only knew that there audience would actually be interested in something less binary and simplistic. people get bored w the same old same old. i find kissing hot in porn. it sorta opens up whole new narratives for me that feel intimate and sexy
Dean: i know, right? and they are always saying how they want there to be chemistry, but if i can't kiss then it's gonna be a lot harder to get it up
Travis: probably in part because it is so rare to see
Dean: yeah, i totally agree, it is rare
GO-GO DANCING
Travis: lets move on to something else you do, dancing.
Dean: ha ha, ok
Travis: what's your style of dance and where can we find you doing said dancing?
Dean: it's usually called "go-go" dancing, but sometimes it's just "standing around in a cage and looking aloof", as one of my managers put it. I dance now at Chaps II in SOMA
Travis: another "top" look i assume, the aloof thing
Dean: but I have danced at Daddy's (when it was Daddy's) and Badlands briefly
Travis: i hate badlands, but chaps II, that's fun. do you enjoy it?
Dean: yeah, it's like, they want you to look like you're vaguely menacing and disinterested. yeah, i hated dancing for badlands
Travis: turds
Dean: lol. um, yes, i really like dancing at Chaps, they're my crowd
Travis: what are you generally thinking about as you shake your money maker?
Dean: it's a little seedy, guys get frisky, you can get away with a little more than you would at like a "A-gay discotheque" or something
Travis: like hand jobs, what? do you get totally buff?
Dean: Funnily enough the first thing I think of is "I didn't have time to exercise so today so I'm glad that I'm doing it now!"
Travis: i like it, dino's needs come first
Dean: you aren't allowed to show your butt crack in san francisco, so I dance in jock straps, most times, and the hang a hankerchief over the strap in the back to hide it...although when it gets busy I usually take it off
Travis: if i remember correctly, you have a favorite pee stained jock strap that you wear with suspenders...
Dean: i sure do
Travis: no butt crack in sf? what the hell
Dean: i also have a great black leather one with a yellow stripe that i pair with black suspenders
Travis: but you can show cock?
Dean: i know, right? kinda weird. Well you can show it for 3 seconds although
Travis: i love that
Dean: i guess that rule kinda goes out the window if it's in someones mouth, technically it's not showing, so...
Travis: one one thousand, two one thousand, three one thousand. nice way to work the system
Dean: heh, yeah, pretty much
ON WATERSPORTS
Travis: okay, we just passed over some nods to watersports. you have quite a few randy bits in your top 10 favorites, watersports being one of them.
Dean: def
Travis: and i know that i have some nice shots of you peeing in your bathroom that didnt make the ITR cut. maybe it will appear here on the site. tell me about the 'sports, what's the appeal?
Dean: it's something so incredibly masculine to me, and there is nothing hotter than kneeling before some hot older hairy guy and drinking right from the tap. when he's got his hand on your head, and he's "in charge"
Travis: my ex jokes to this day, 'it's sterile you know'
Dean: ha ha
Travis: oooooh
Dean: well, yes, it's also good for neutralizing jelly fish stings
Travis: gross, lets keep it to pee
Dean: well, ok. ha ha
Travis: how often do you normally engage in 'sports? do you go to piss parties?
Dean: you know, i don't do it nearly as much as i would like to...i have been thinking about that a lot lately, funny you should bring it up. I also just wrote in my journal "Piss Play Groups in SF" to remind myself. My buddy is going to this big Golden Party in Palm Springs this weekend, which I almost went to but unfortunately I'm not...I usually end up at the long urinal at the Eagle on Sundays, though :)
Travis: does the giving/receiving of piss normally become the main event, or does it often lead to fucking or what not? you have sex at the eagle too, dont you?
Dean: i like getting pissed on and in...i love the idea of getting pissed up the ass! I jerked off to a video of that twice today, in fact. and yes, i usually end up either having sex at the eagle, or bringing someone outside to fuck in an alley. i had totally naked sex in broad daylight right outside the eagle in a car a few weeks ago
Travis: "jesse dean, quit fucking in the alley!"
Dean: i can hear it now
Travis: anything that's off limits for you? no, hang on, lets go back to getting pissed in your ass. what's that like?
Dean: it's wet, warm, messy, and is just fucking hot! when i first came to sf years ago, i went to the eagle for the first time and ended up going home with some daddy, and he gave me a beer enema (with the bottle and everything) and that led me to the next logical conclusion, which was finding someone to piss up my ass.
Travis: do you just spit it back out in his face?
Dean: it's harder than you might think. yeah, if i recall correctly, he just lapped it up right from my ass.
Travis: damn! that does sound hot and plain old randy
Dean: heh heh
Travis: okay, before we move on, is there anything that's off limits for you?
Dean: poo. def not into poo.
Travis: i dont think ive ever met anyone who was, or admitted as much.
Dean: i like being pushed around, pissed on/in, cum, sweat, nipples, pits, uniforms. i've def seen ads on craigslist
Travis: you never find yourself rimming a dirty butthole then?
speaking of craigslist...
Dean: no way, jose! i mean, sweaty, yes, but pooey, uh uh.
THE OTHER GUYS IN THE VIDEO
Travis: so what did you think of the other guys in the ITR piece?
Dean: you know, i met some super friendly, introspective and attractive guys at your house the night of the final. i think vulnerable comes to mind, too
Travis: that they were vulnerable? or you felt that way?
Dean: not necessarily vulnerable in a scared way, but just open, and i think part of that had to do with how you filmed. i saw parts of myself in some of the other guys
Travis: what parts?
Dean: hm, sensitive to how they project themselves, how people see them, a little fey, sweet
Travis: some kinship of sorts
Dean: i tend to see myself as being more tender than aggressive, sexually and emotionally, although i act out aggressively
Travis: among thoughtful sexy men
Dean: yeah, a definite kinship
Travis: anyone there or at the screening that you thought, hmmm....
Dean: there were a lot of guys that i thought had intriguing stories, and def some attractive boys. i remember thinking that it would be nice to get to know some of them better through further potlucks. i didn't really talk to any one person for long enough to connect on a deeper level, so i guess my interest is "piqued"
Travis: ill consider you piqued.
ON DATING
Travis: are you dating anyone or interested in dating right now?
Dean: i haven't had a boyfriend, or someone that i dated steadily, for the last 3 or 4 years, and i am quite open to dating again. there are a host of guys that i see amicably and sexually, but no one that i would want to date, unfortunately.
Travis: what would you be looking for in a mate?
Dean: well i was in 2 LTR's, one off and on for 7 years and the other for 3 (we were fianceed, actually), and what kept us together was our friendship. There's nothing better than a guy you can come home to, suck off, watch the simpsons, have a beer and talk about mundane shit with...more specifically, though, it's fairly important to me to be engaged with someone who speaks at least one other language, because since I am also a linguist, and speak so many myself, that is something that I guy has to possess in order to attract my attention. i also like older guys, hairy men with tats
Travis: you speak...12 languages?
Dean: i also am very un monogamous. yeah, to varying degrees
Travis: that's crazy impressive
Dean: well thank you, it's my biggest passion and i'm just lucky that i'm also good at it
Travis: i think it was the first thing you told me about yourself. nice.
IT'S THURSDAY NIGHT
Travis: are you going out or staying in w michael keaton? he needs the work, i know
Dean: well i'm onto The Muppet Movie now, however, my buddy Daniel wants me to come over and watch horror flicks with him. I will probably just end up staying here for the night, jerk off for the 5th time today, and go to bed. I suspect this weekend will require my energy...so we're gonna keep it low key.
Travis: are you joc strap dancing for $$ at deco tomorrow night?
Dean: what's the event? is there a contest?
Travis: bus station jon, the rod, $100 for best wet jock strap
Dean: a ha, i see.
Travis: i thought of you, obviously
Dean: just perhaps, just perhaps
